Self Compassion and Spiritual Resilience: Why You’re Not Lazy or Self-Sabotaging
Recently, someone asked me a surprising and wonderful question: “Angela, why do you do this work?” I sat back and thought about it. There are many reasons, but the deepest one is this: my own experience has shown me again and again that the Medicine Path leads us to spiritual resilience. And when I say resilience, I really mean wisdom.
Wisdom is what happens when knowledge, practice, and lived experience are alchemized into something embodied. In today’s world, we are drowning in information but lacking true wisdom, and that lack shows up in the decisions being made on a global level, and in the meaningless crisis so many of us feel.
Why I walk the Medicine Path
The Medicine Path has taught me how to:
Slow down and lean into more grounded ways of being
Sit with and embody big life decisions
Embrace my pain as a sacred teacher
Face the enormity of the cascading global crises while staying connected to my life’s meaning
Meet both life and death at once
And most importantly, how to keep choosing love, even when everything in me wants to turn away.
These lessons may sound intangible, but they have shaped the way I hold compassion for myself, for others, and for the world. And let’s be honest: kindness and compassion are the medicines our world desperately needs right now.
Of course, I don’t always find compassion easily. I am human too! But ceremony, spiritual practice, and embodied somatic work have laid these patterns into my nervous system so I can reach for them when I need them most.
The Problem with “Upleveling” Culture
One thing I struggle with in the personal development world is the constant pressure to “uplevel,” to “10X everything,” or to “just push through.” Sometimes, it feels eerily similar to the conditioning many of us grew up with where we were told to “suck it up!” It often feels like the same thing but just repackaged with a spiritual or entrepreneurial gloss.
What concerns me most is when coaches use language like “you’re self-sabotaging” or “you’re making excuses.” This is not trauma-informed. And here’s why:
Trauma survivors, HSPs, and people with less privilege often carry more shame due to systemic oppression and lived trauma. Telling them they’re “lazy” or “sabotaging” adds another layer of shame.
Your brain is wired for safety. The amygdala (your inner protector) sounds the alarm whenever you face change. Even when the change is positive, it feels uncertain and stressful. That stress response can hijack your frontal brain (the part that makes logical, intentional choices) and drop you into fight, flight, or freeze.
So, when you find yourself on the couch, “stuck” in freeze instead of moving forward with your plans, it’s not sabotage—it’s biology. Your nervous system is simply trying to keep you safe, comfortable, and predictable.
This is why shame-based narratives are so harmful. They make us believe there’s something wrong with us, when in fact, it’s just how the human nervous system works.
You are not lazy. You are not broken. You are not making excuses. You are human.
The N.A.P.S. System: A Practice for Self Compassion
When you feel stuck, frozen, or critical of yourself, it’s time to turn toward self compassion. I created what I call the N.A.P.S. System, a simple, spiritual practice to cut off self-judgement and bring you back to steadiness. (And yes, actual naps are also highly recommended!)
Step 1: Notice and Normalize
Pause and simply notice what’s happening. If you’re frozen on the couch, recognize it without judgment. Normalize it: my nervous system is wired for safety, and this makes sense.
Step 2: Affirm and Acknowledge
Affirm that you are doing your best. Acknowledge how far you’ve come and the resilience it’s taken to be here today.
Step 3: Play with the Portions
Break your next step into bite-sized pieces. Instead of tackling the whole plan, pick one small, doable action.
Step 4: Soothe and Step Into Action
Soothe your body first: take a few slow breaths, step outside, journal, or stretch. Then, when you’re ready, take that one small action.
Remember:
Self compassion is not about letting yourself “off the hook.” It’s about working with your nervous system instead of against it. It’s about building spiritual resilience by meeting yourself with kindness. When you practice self compassion, you stop fueling the cycle of shame and start walking a gentler, steadier path. So next time you hear the voice that says, “I’m sabotaging, I’m lazy, I’m failing,” remember this truth:
You are not broken.
You are human.
And you are worthy of compassion.
If you found this helpful, bookmark it for later and share it with a friend! You can also find me on Instagram, Facebook, SoundCloud, YouTube and LinkedIn.
A great place to stay in touch is through my mailing list, where you will have first access to upcoming posts, events, and discounts for events, workshops and immersive series!
You can sign up to join our newsletter community here:
Join Me and Experience the Path
Events and Retreats
Apprenticeship
1:1 Sessions
All of my blog posts are from original writings and ideas, run through AI for grammar and refinement.